Saturday, February 14, 2009

And....the Ugly

Update: After I realized I posted 38 cakes in one post, I've tried to condense and organize.
A little.
And I awarded prizes for the top "4" cake wrecks.

I can't help myself.

This post concludes all the great (and horrific) cakes that are my favorites from everything Jen (the author* of Cake Wrecks**) has posted. This is the third installment of "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly."

Yup, folks, this is the ugly. Jen verified that these were all cakes made by 'professionals' (hopefully a few people got full refunds on their cakes!). I can't help but make fun of these cakes; don't take it personally. It's because they were really made this wrong that they're so funny. And here they are:

This is the honorary FIRST Literal LOL cake. So funny that a Cake Wreck blog was started. Jen's exact (hilarious and witty) words:

"...And underneath that, write 'We will miss you'. Got it?"

Oh yeah, they got it.


A recycled happy face cake. As a mummy?

What I can't get over is that another 'wreckporter' (anyone who takes a pic of a cake wreck and submits it to the blog author, Jen) found another recycled happy face cake-turned-halloween-mummy, at a completely different store! More than one person had the bright idea to try and re-use a smiley-face cake as a seasonal cake. Too funny!

Sigh. This is embarrassing. I mean, really. "Counst"? On a good-looking (probably chocolate!) cake meant to inspire the average American to do his or her civic duty? I think my cousin Shelly's words are much more moving (she voted pretty much just before she had her twins)

Ironically, the gal who decorated this cake excitedly told the customer what a big Obama fan she is.

"Harry Hollday!" And we really mean that!

Religious confusion....

Stingy cake decorator. Only one season's greeting?

Runner up (4th place)-

I laughed SO hard at this one. "Oh oh oh, Merry Christmas!" Buaaaahaahaaa!! *Wipes tears from my eyes*

All the baker had to do was stick the little "Ho ho ho saying" into the cupcakes. That's ALL! Notice that the next box over on the right, was also incorrectly assembled.

Notice two different cakes spell "Cardinals" wrong (Cardnials), yet the cake on the bottom right is spelled correctly. Must have been a shift change between cakes. The misspeller has better handwriting, though.

I guess someone wanted to use up the decals from the last Superbowl, so this was their compromise.

Come on, really? The sad thing is, I'll bet you someone bought that when it was the last cake sitting in the bakery on Superbowl Sunday.

"Hello? Yes, I'd like a cake with the Olympic Rings on it."

So where are the actual rings? And why the parentheses?

How did that mistake even get made?

Customer: "Uhhh...."

Bakery employee: "You asked for Sweet Nothings on the cookie cake, did you not?"

"Valetenis" day? I mean, come on! The decorator didn't even try to spell it right!


A Literal Lol, where a customer describes what to write or how to write it, and the baker inscribes it all, word-for-word. Some of these are just so obvious!

Heh heh heh. *chuckle* "We'll missed you" (And not even an exclamation point to help express this lovely message!) This is like Brian Regan's "Take Luck!"-- bit from his comedy routine.

Ouch. I mean, really. Ouch! How tacky is a cake that says congrats to "Keith & Bride"?
"Hi. I just want a simple cake with balloons and sprinkles, that says 'Congratulations,' three times."
Um.... Yet another Literal LOL. The decorator writes exactly what the customer says, rather than using common sense or clarifying what are directions, and what are the actual words desired on the cakes.

I'm chuckling out loud at this Literal LOL.

How is it that decorators don't pay attention to the difference between phrases to put on cakes, and the description of how to execute the spoken instructions?
"I'd like the cake to say 'Happy Birthday Joanna & Ernie.' Or 'Ernie & Joanna.' Whichever way looks better."
How did the decorator miss that the customer wanted the cake done in green frosting???
There's another cake that says "Welcome Baby in Pink," and the cake is a bright yellow color.
There's a longer story behind this one, but essentially the customer tried to take it easy on the decorater, and instead of asking for a "Yellow brick road" birthday cake, asked for a cake that said "Somewhere over the rainbow."
Well, at least she got "Somewheres" over a rainbow, I guess.

This decorator really is clueless, and I highly doubt he/she has little children. Instead of reading "Blues Clues," (notice the strange "paws" drawn at the corners) the cake reads something like "Bules Clueless."

2nd place-

"It's my best friend's 30th birthday! Just put a 'black high heel' on it. This is going to be great!"....


How is it possible to fail at decorating a "Fail" cake?

3rd place-

One of my favorites! Yet another literal LOL. So sad, since I like the cake and the handwriting. The realistic little tassel end on the graduation cap is even a nice touch, and the cap is done well, as are the roses.

But where are the sprinkles I asked for???


Such a pretty cake, too! Too bad it says "It's a Gril."

Ouch. Hope the little 'sweetie' who got this cake didn't end up with the nickname 'Swetty'. Yikes!

Jen thinks this is the coolest cake ever because it takes Star Wars and meshes it with airbrushing and the cutest little baby ever. But I think it's highly amusing because I simply CANNOT picture Darth Vader holding this little precious, innocent baby, let alone not spontaneously combusting by being around all that feminine coloring and cuteness. It's just not him!


(CupCake Cakes, not to be confused with very cool cupcake mosaics, where cupcakes are creatively but individually decorated)

This is not a cake wreck. Though Jen claims to be utterly against CCCs because frosting is slathered across the top of multiple cupcakes to look like a cake, usually quite un-artistically, I think this is a pretty good CCC. Though the the artist in me especially loves the Van Gogh CCC below:

This is also not a cake wreck. It's CCC is quite artfully done. Placing it on a frame really adds a nice touch, doesn't it? Thought it would be nice to stick in these two good-looking pics to give your eyes a break from all the horror-cakes.

FIRST PLACE (My favorite!):

This one really takes the cake! *snicker*

You must visit the actual blog post about this to get the background on this true story, where the customer asked if they'd print picture of his boss on a cake, and brought in the jump drive for them so they could simply upload the picture and print it edible paper and slap it on the cake.
I really think this is the creme de la creme of all these cake decorating faux pas!

The WINNERS (my favorites):
4th-- The "Oh oh oh" christmas cupcakes
3rd-- The "I want sprinkles" graduation cake
2nd-- The "Black high hill" cake
1st--The 'jump drive' "congratulations boss" cake

*Jen, thanks for deciding to gather and post cake wrecks and provide witty commentary for us all, and thanks to your loyal wreckporters who keep sending in new pics of cake wrecks that are still being made all over the world!
**Katie, thank you for pointing out this website. I saved copies of all my favorites to post here. And I can't wait to see the finished product of your fondant valentine cake!


Jane @ What About Mom? said...

These make me feel better about all the birthday cakes I do for my girls.

I love that fondant stuff with a passion. A friend of mine was making her sister's cake and I was really surprised at how easy the fondant looked -- maybe she just made it look easy. And we got to eat the rice crispy treat bases she practiced on!

Kimbooly said...

You are my favorite person for the rest of today, just for leaving a comment on my super-long post. : ) I've probably only checked to see if there was a comment, oh, 18 times in the last few days?

In Jen's defense, she never makes fun of home-made cakes, and in fact applauds people that try to make their own.

I love the fondant too. I mean, edible clay that's not the gooey peanut butter kind your kids play with? How cool is that? It can make cakes look incredible.

My only issue with fondant is that although it's edible, it tastes terrible. But my cousin says there's a way to make it taste good, so I'd better learn it.

Crazy Daisy said...

Oh My Goodness. I'm totally new here and this just sealed the deal in my coming back!